Have you ever heard parents telling their children, “Children, the money you earn, use it on yourself. You don’t have to give us money, because we already have enough. Anyway your salary is low, expenses are high, you have loans to repay, living expenses to bear, children to raise…”
Dear readers, can we say this kind of words to our children? Do these words follow the teachings of the Bible?
In the Gospel of Mark, chapter 7, Jesus rebukes the Pharisees and teachers of law:
“10 For Moses said, ‘Honour your father and mother,’ and, ‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.’ 11 But you say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is Corban (that is, devoted to God) — 12 then you no longer let them do anything for their father or mother. 13 Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like that.” (Mark 7)
Jesus teaches us to honour our parents, to provide for them. We cannot say to our parents, “The money I would have given you is already given to God, I don’t have any more to give you.”
Children giving money to parents is right and proper. It is a concrete expression of honouring parents.
Once, I visited an old woman who complained, “My son doesn’t honour me!” So I asked her, “Ah mu, how does your son not honour you?” She expressed clearly, “He doesn’t give a single cent to me! He doesn’t honour me!”
Another old lady said, “My daughter honours me a lot!” I asked, “That’s great, what does she do?” “She gives me 300 ringgit every month!” The old lady replied proudly.
You see, giving money is a concrete expression of honouring parents. But giving money does not necessarily mean honouring parents, if it is given reluctantly or without thanksgiving. What about not giving money? Not giving money is not honouring parents. What about giving money? We need to give cheerfully, give thankfully. This is the expression of honouring parents.
The God who owns the universe lacks nothing. He says:
10 for every animal of the forest is mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills. 11 I know every bird in the mountains, and the insects in the fields are mine. 12 If I were hungry I would not tell you, for the world is mine, and all that is in it. (Psalms 50)
But God did not tell us that we do not have to give him anything. Instead, he says to the Israelites: “Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this … and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.” (Malachi 3:10)
God also says to you and me, “Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Cor 9:7) We need to give money to God, and to give cheerfully.
Parents, we do not need to be greater than God. So do not say to your children, “We have money, don’t give us any more.” Let your children learn to honour you.
Children, if your parents tell you, “We have money, you don’t have to give us any more.” What should be your response? You should still give them money regularly, to express your love for them and to honour them in a practical way.