Every time when my husband and I came back from leading a marriage enrichment camp, I would feel great joy. Not so much about ourselves but about the couples who attended the camp. It is such a beautiful thing to be able to walk through life and grow old together as a married couple. Yet it is not a natural thing that can happen unless there are some intentional efforts from both parties. Every couple has a romantic beginning, but as the days go by, feelings begin to fade. With no hard work put into it, a marriage may go to a place of no return. The world shows us the way to solve the marriage problem is to go through divorce, yet the truth is that it may lead into greater suffering and pain both for the couple and the family.
In the book of “Song of Songs” in the Old Testament, the author Solomon extols romantic love with very clear images, enough to make one blush. Love, under Solomon’s pen, is a powerful energy. It can destroy and build up. It is as strong as death, as unyielding as the grave.
Judging from the literal explanation, it is about romantic love between a young couple; however, another way of looking at this is to allegorize the book to depict the passionate love of God and His people the Israelites. The book in the Jewish culture is one of the “Five Scrolls” of Judaism and is read during the spring festival, Passover time. This Holy Scripture is even called the “Holy of Holies”. Romantic love between husband and wife has been raised into a higher level to learn to see in the light of the love between the covenant God and His covenant people.
As for the marriage enrichment retreat, it is not that this camp has any magical properties. Perhaps it is because these couples were willing to invest time and energy into their relationships for three days and two nights, and thus change began to slowly happen. Of course, it is undeniable that God’s love brings about permanent change. A marriage that puts God first is one major reason for breakthrough in a relationship.
Love must be more than just romance or feelings. It should be a commitment and a covenant. “Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm…. Many waters cannot quench love.” (Song of Songs 8:6-7) Understand this is God’s love for us and hence it should be the kind of commitment we have towards our spouses.
By Winnie Chan Lay Preacher of Wesley Methodist Church, Sibu